Victorious alum Daniella Monet was beyond excited to announce she was expecting her second child together with fiancé Andrew Gardner last month.
The 31-year-old mom of one confirmed to PEOPLE exclusively one week after her pregnancy announcement that she was expecting a daughter and the news came to her as a surprise because Monet “always saw herself with two boys” before getting pregnant with a sibling for the couple’s 1-year-old son Gio James. “I’m like, ‘I’m a boy mom,’ ” Monet told PEOPLE.
Monet is now worried about her baby boy Gio as she is over halfway through her pregnancy knowing that her time with Gio is ticking away.
Is there such a thing as mom-guilt when it comes to growing your family? Monet wrote on Instagram:
“I already miss Gio. I’m over halfway through this pregnancy and I can feel our time with Gio and only Gio ticking away.
Is there such a thing as mom-guilt when it comes to growing your family???
Don’t get me wrong, I know our hearts are fully capable of loving each of our babies to the fullest, but I can’t help but sometimes feel badly knowing Gio will have to share his mom + dad with his baby sister soon.
Here’s the moment I think it hit me. At about 10.5 months old Gio decided he didn’t want to nurse anymore. I was about 3 months pregnant and couldn’t help but feel like it was my fault. What likely happened is my milk changed due to my colostrum possibly coming in for baby #2.
It was at that point we decided together that he was weaned.
Part of me was relieved. I was already thinking about how I would nurse 2 babies at the same time, but the other part of me felt guilty wondering how much longer he would’ve nursed had my milk stayed the same for him.
I turned to the @peanut app to see if any moms had had the same experience as me, and it turns out second time mom guilt is a thing.
The women I connected with reminded me that as moms, we tend to focus and dwell on things that we could have done differently but sometimes, we need to cut ourselves some slack. All that matters is that our babies are in a safe and loving environment.
Knowing that I’m not alone helped me feel so much better. Motherhood is a wild journey, but one I’m very grateful to be on. Having realized that so many other moms felt similarly – I wanted to share this to help normalize our feelings.
To any mamas, mamas-to-be or women trying to conceive out there – check out @peanut. It’s an app with a huge community of women in your own neighborhood, who can share advice and offer a shoulder to lean on when you need it.
Feelings come and go, just like the variety of fleeting stages we go through with our little ones. We all deserve to feel supported.”
Some fans shared their thoughts with Monet:
Whether you’ve never heard of mom guilt or can’t escape its relentless grip, it simply means that pervasive feeling of not doing enough as a parent, not doing things right, or making decisions that may “mess up” your kids in the long run.
